What has happened to holidays?

Everyone who knows me knows that I am a avid shopper.  I love a bargain.  I love to browse stores.  I shop all year around.   On vacation I enjoy shopping new stores and new venues.

With that introduction, I state my unequivocal opposition to the early shopping on Thanksgiving Evening.   We have so few holidays to spend with friends and family.  

Now we have the additional pressure that people have to leave by 5 pm to get to Store A, B, C to get the special.

It may be that there are some genuine great buys.  I have explored the Black Friday deals online which have been going on all week (and even before this week).   I see no great deals on anything I want.  

One technology store has deals on everything but its most desirable item.  Most of the other sales I have seen are the same as the continuing cycle of sales.  There are so many sales.  I rarely go into a store without a store coupon.  I rarely shop online without a "deal."

The fervor of Black Friday (now beginning Thursday night) is an adventure that may become a tradition, but it is eroding the tradition of Thanksgiving.

That is not surprising.  As the ties of family erode in our society, there are more opportunities to "do one's thing."  Shopping on a national holiday is only part of a larger trend to break down societal ties in favor of economic gain.

A Tragedy of Our Society

Everyone knows we have the world's highest productivity in agriculture and possibly the cheapest food in the world (as a percentage of total expenses).  

Be that as it may, we increasingly hear about the hunger in our country.   I give generously to food shelves and to agencies that feed the homeless and the helpless, both in cash and in food donations.  But, I wonder why increasingly the solicitations I receive all relate to food distribution.  

Are we creating a permanent dependency?  

Are people learning that they don't have to spend for food, but can spend for other things? I am not talking about the homeless, the abandoned, and others who are in a pitiful situation.

I grew up in a modest home.  We were poor, but we always had food.  We did not have a car or many other luxuries.   One part of me wonders about the values of people who do not feed their children breakfast but have many other "luxuries."

Schools have had to take over feeding many children.  Churches and social services are collecting and distributing food endlessly.
I will continue to participate, but I will also question the values of our society.

Walletless Society?

My latest issue of Businessweek posits that we are moving toward a walletless society.   We may be moving toward a cashless society, but a walletless one?   I wonder.

The number of cards and IDs we have is growing.  I have two cards to go to Barnes and Noble.  As of yesterday, I have two cards to go to Kohl's.  And they want me to add an app.  There are few places I go where I do not have to have an ID.  Even restaurant loyalty cards.  For some of these one can use a phone number, instead of the card, but the card is there.

Yes, we can add another app to our phones or ipads or tablets.   There is a limit to how many apps one can put on the phone unless one wants to buy a 128 gb phone and flip through pages of apps to find the right one.  Each source assumes theirs is the primary app. you will use.  
I have a 64 gb Ipad, and it slows down when too many apps are open.   Most people do not close off the open apps.  
Since my Ipad also has my granddaughter's games (MANY of them -- perhaps 200 despite my efforts to reduce them), it demonstrates well what a phone or iPad can bear.   I have two apps for Target, about 3 or 4 for Amazon, several for Apple and its related sites.   And so on.

ApplePay and similar vehicles designed to make us walletless are new.   We do not know how secure they are.   The hackers are no doubt studying hard on how they can beat the system.

Although my friends know me as an early adapter, this is one trend where I will proceed slowly   As someone whose credit cards have been hacked about four times in the past six years (3 different credit cards),  I am reluctant to try a means where I have even less control.

My wallet is getting thicker, not thinner.  I don't anticipate giving it up anytime soon.  In fact, I frequently go through the wallet removing those credit cards for stores.   Yesterday I visited two stores where I infrequently go.  Those special cards are already out of the wallet and put away.

I see our cards growing, not shrinking, because of loyalty programs and their rewards.  

Where is leadership?

Lately because of my own busy work and travel schedule, I have not written any entries, but I have been doing some interesting reading.
One interesting book is Paris Letters, written in blog style.  A successful copy writer gives up her job to live abroad. Very interesting adventures.

I have also started Hard Choices, which I am greatly enjoying.  It is well written and engaging.

 I have been searching through listings for new books on leadership and have been disappointed. Not much is new.  The tried and true titles come up but nothing new.

Simplify, simplify, simplify

In our busy, cluttered lives, it is important to simplify.  The act of simplifying our lives is not once and done.  It is a continual process, multifaceted, and affects all aspects of our lives. 

Some people think that cleaning out a closet once is simplifying.  It is but it is a limited form.  Simplifying suggests that we examine every facet of our life.  For me, paper is a big thing. My recycling bin is amazing considering I live alone.   I recycle and recycle but the paper does not seem to diminish.  For every piece I recycle another seems to add to the pile.   

Decluttering a home is one form of simplication.  But there are many others.

Cutting back on errands and doing them more efficiently is another form of simplification.  Combine errands and go to a mall or shopping center where you can do multiple errands.  I am fortunate to live near a small mall that has a grocery store, a Target, a UPS, a dry cleaner, and so on.   A little further is a cul de sac with a post office and a bank.  Elaine St. James is a good source for learning to simplify your errands and tasks. 

(In another post I will talk about simplifying your home.)

Learning to say "no" is essential for simplification.     No to what?  Too many meetings?  Too many social obligations.   Think about it.  I will write more later. 

Setting Priorities

A key to getting anything accomplished is the ability to set priorities.  Often we are so caught up in the hectic pace of life that we do not think about setting priorities.  We just do what has to be done.  Often not mindfully.  Almost like robots.

The busier we are the more likely we are not to set priorities unless we are one of these unique people who can set priorities without too much stewing.   In some ways we all set priorities by what we do and what we don't do.  

If I choose to take a walk instead of going out with friends, that demonstrates a priority.  If I choose a television special over playing with the children, that too demonstrates a priority.  If I choose to go out with friends instead of visiting family, that too is a priority.

We live our priorities by what we do.   It's time to try to put some choice and selection into those priorities.

Often we say:  How did time slip by so quickly?   I did not realize how late it is.  I did not realize the deadline is tomorrow?   I did not get a chance to see him/her before I left town.   And so on.

Take a few minutes each day and certainly every week to set your priorities.   They are not cast in stone, but can help to guide us as to what is important. 

Planning your day realistically

This blog is taken from some reflections for women that I am putting together.
The first of these deals with our normal daily tasks and "to do" lists.   The key is to be realistic.
Often we are frustrated when we plan to do more than it is possible to achieve in any one day.  My thoughts.

 

Plan your day well but do not try to achieve more than is possible.   All of us have to do lists and must do lists and can do lists.   A key to achievement is to plan realistically what is possible and don’t expect to do more than in possible within the span of a day or a week. 

At the end of the day, count your achievements rather than what was not achieved.  It is frustrating to focus on what remains unfinished.

I find that it is helpful to cross out or check off what I have done.   That gives a sense of accomplishment.

You might make a to do list on paper or on a tablet like an Ipad.  I do both.  Some lists on paper and some on Ipad.  When I am on vacation, I often make a  to do list of bigger tasks for when I get home.   I work through the list when I get home .  

Realistic planning of what we can do and doing it is part of effective living.